be definite.

Rudolf Steiner, Essentials of Education:

A fundamental issue in teaching and education is the question of who the teacher is. What must really live in the children, what must vibrate and well up into their very hearts, wills, and eventually into their intellect, lives initially in the teachers. It arises simply through who they are, through their unique nature, character, and soul attitude, and through what they bring the children out of their own self-development. So we can see how a true knowledge of the human being, cultivated and embracing everything, can be the single foundation for a true art of teaching and fulfill the living needs of education.

A popular theme encountered in learning how to communicate effectively is that it’s not what you say that achieves the persuasive edge, but how you say it. How you say something is the tone and the attitude underlying how you really feel about what you’re saying. And, how you feel about what you’re talking about reveals its actual value to you — reveals your actual level of belief and confidence in it. To persuade others of the value of anything you must first persuade yourself. The best way to convey anything is to be an example of it. Words may convince the intellect, thoughts may stir the emotions, but actions confirm beyond a doubt your intent, trust and belief in the thing.

Act as if you are where you want to be, and be happy about it. Might as well; you have nothing to lose and only better, more satisfying experiences in alignment with who you really are, to gain. Be that person that makes you happy. Acting on what fulfills you is the best thing you can do, whether you see through rose-coloured glasses, through a glass darkly, through your own eyeballs… whatever your chosen perspective. Whether choosing an optimistic perspective on life (”Be the change you want to see in the world”) or at the other end of the motivated spectrum (”The best revenge is a life well-lived”), doing what you love is the best way to feel good about yourself.

Attitudes are the actions, feelings or moods which determine the actions, feelings or moods of others. Your attitude signals to the world and others what you expect to receive, positive or negative, by your undertaking to do a thing. An attitude of positive expectation convinces others that you will get the thing you desire, and gives them confidence in your ability to do so. An the other hand, an attitude of defeat implies that you do not really care about your goal nor believe in your ability to accomplish it. With an attitude of low enthusiasm and excitement for your aim, how do you think others will respond to you on the stage you’ve set for yourself? How successfully do you think you’ll engage in the pursuit of your goal when even you yourself are not convinced of its attainment?

Your attitude is the intangible key to your success. Your attitude sets you apart and imparts to your actions that extra ’something’. The way in which you do things, how you approach your life and the people in it, signals to all what you intend to receive. If you expect something, act like you have it or are ready to have it!

Act as if you are already where you want to be. Invisible causes are recognized by their effects.

Let me say that again.

Causes are recognized by their effects. The physical is the effect of the mental cause. In tangible terms, someone who is financially wealthy and knows how to manage his/her finances and who uses money as a valuable tool, will treat money with respect and put it to good use. On the other hand, in someone else’s mind, money may be associated with negative feelings of anxiety and therefore he/she will show an uncomfortableness or an avoidance of responsibly managing his/her finances. Their actions and results reveal their mindset. The effects reveal the cause.

Think as the person you desire to be. Sounds simple. Try it. Your mindset is your attitude, the pattern according to which your reality takes shape. If you want to be in a loving relationship, picture what your life would be like if you were already there. Would you dress better, write a loving note, make dinner each night, smile more, have an ordered home, have a routine involving a morning walk or some form of exercise, go to sleep thinking about how grateful you are about your life? What are the side effects of your goal? Figure those out. Then, get comfortable with living them. Try something small to get started and do what you are comfortable with doing to begin. This way you can act as if you are already where you want to be, while trying out if this is really what you want in the first place. Maybe you think you want to sleep with someone every night, but when you practice by inviting your great dane to sleep on half the bed, you realize that you value your solitary bedtime (or decide to invest in a bigger bed.) There’s no substitute for experience. Furthermore, by acting as though you are already comfortable with, for example:

• having lots of money
• being of service and using your talents
• feeling good about your life by enjoying yourself and going after what you want

… others are attracted to you and to your attitude of enthusiasm. Because you’re already teaching them who you are and what you expect, and ready to receive what you want, the things that you desire will come to you that much faster! You’ll be in resonance with what you want. You’ll be aligned with what you want. Other people will take your cue and think of you in the way your actions show you to think of yourself. (People are busy. People love to save time and thought energy and be told what to think; therefore, do them and yourself a favour by telling them exactly who you are and what you expect from yourself and from life. And hey, by doing this you are providing quality service. You are a living example of integrity (being true to your desires) and persistence (believing that you will be/have/do what is best, despite the temporary appearances of the current environment). This display of character alone is a service to the world and a benefit to witness. Win-win.)

This is a point that I would stress with all the power at my command. It is not so much what you say as it is the TONE and MANNER in which you say it that makes a lasting impression.

It naturally follows, therefore, that sincerity of purpose, honesty and earnestness must be placed back of all that one says if one would make a lasting and favourable impression.

Whatever you successfully sell to others you must first sell to yourself!

- (Napoleon Hill, The Law of Success, “Enthusiasm” p. 118, 1928)

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